Dear Janice, It might not matter what you did in the past. Some children will find things to hold against you regardless. I have one daughter that is just mean. Two daughters and a son that say I was a great mother. I walk on eggs around all of them. I know you only have two, so I have twice as much chance of getting some love and appreciation, but I don't. . Your moving to France is lovely. It will be very disappointing if you live your life always trying to make up for what you think you didn't do right or scramble to get your adult children to care about you. It's defeating, I know. But a lot is their personalities. I'm sorry for your sadness. I admire what you've done with your life.