Friends grow weary of my story. From the outside looking in, I’m crazy. When my husband and I got divorced, I had very little feelings for him. He had broken my heart and soul. After 27 years of marriage, he became an alcoholic. A serious alcoholic. Blackouts disappearing for days at a time. I dated a little bit over the years, but never anything serious. Five weeks was the longest and I never got close to anyone. He would come around whenever I asked. He was very good to me and did very good things for me. He relapsed in 2019. He always wanted to get remarried. I never found anyone else I cared about so I told him I would agree to that if he could be sober for two years. That would’ve been November. In the meantime, I never had much affection. I seriously didn’t feel affectionate towards him. And I was concerned about that. He arranged for us to see a counselor last year for advice on getting back together and communicating better. I told the counselor the only thing holding me back from Reuniting with my husband was him possibly relapsing . I’m sure the counselor told him that. But, my ex knew that too. We definitely put God aside or least I did. I continued to go to church, but not studied the Word much. He studied at home because he didn’t like any churches. Sometimes he would spend the night and we would sleep together, but we never had sex or even kissed. He was OK with that because he knew where I was coming from. If we got into an intimate relationship, we may as well consider we were back together. We wanted to honor our vows and stay together. Neither one of us has slept with anyone else. But, He had a woman coming over on Sunday mornings to fellowship with him. She used to go to a Bible study close by but somehow she ended up dropping out and going to his house. I never knew anything about it. In retrospect, he kept a lot of secrets from me secrets of omission. So in August he walked out of my house and would not communicate with me anymore. He never told me why he was leaving me. My son told me. My ex was dating that woman. I felt like part of my body got turned off. I was falling back in love with him. A sober msn he is very good. Then my ex came back in October saying there were too many red flags with her and lifestyle differences. They were not compatible. I asked his forgiveness for the way I’ve acted over the years and waiting so long to reunite. I have been praying and that’s what was on my heart to do. We fell immediately in each other’s arms. That lasted for two weeks. I got Covid and during my isolation he stopped communicating with me again. I found out later. He was engaged to that woman, even when he came back to me in October. They only see each other on Sundays and I have no idea why they got engaged. Plus, he gave her His wedding tong I put on his finger in 1987 for an engagement ring. Sorry this is so long. It’s all very hurtful and this is why absolutely no one thinks I should ever want to be with him again. My family hates him. But, my four children and grandchildren love him and except him. nothing but bad things happened to him since he walked out my door in August. He started getting less work and then lost his job completely. Probably because he was drinking again. He got his fourth OVI in December. That’s a felony count in Ohio so right now he’s in jail. My heart is just with him but my brain says stay away. Let her have him. It’s just so hard. Tell me more about your story.
I will definitely read your poem. I may already have. Once again, apologies for the life of this.