I would have been thrilled to go to college with my friends and become the physician I planned to become. She would have been a gift to a wonderful couple who deserved this baby and a second chance for me. A great scenario. But my parents were selfish. They were glad to sacrifice me, the loser of their four kids, to get a grandbaby. They told everyone they wanted a grandchild, a baby, and I was the incubator. No longer worth anything. Disposable. Once she was born I was chopped liver. Still am.