Memories mixed with "looking back" can contradict one another. There is my problem—that crossroad. I believe God has been telling me to run- this guy does not really love you. When I picture my ex in prayers he has a big red X across his body....I'm serious. I know I am not listening to God. Every day my Jesus Calling reading speaks straight to me and my situation. What more has to happen? I was going for the 2 years sober mark (November) to remarry my him. Just before the 2 years he gets a girlfriend (August) that he has been seeing on Sundays for probably a year. I never knew anything about her. She knows nothing about me and he asks her to marry him!! He comes back to me in October but can't stay because I know he's drinking again. I smell it. But, he's engaged to her!! He loses his job. He gets another DUI and now sits in jail until April this time. I know God is not causing these things to happen to him but somehow they are. How many more signs do I need that it's time to let go? Let the past stay in the past. LET GO.