This is a low point for you. You could sit on a dime and swing your legs! There’s no magic to change what you are experiencing in this new and different life. I can’t imagine being without the kids around . Mines dad rarely took them. One friend who was down like you stopped all dating or even considering dating. She focused on herself and she’s now doing well. Could you spoil yourself just a little? Massage? Pedi? You deserve and need it. You are important and significant.