Well, I did get it worked out peacefully with my niece but my sister hasn't spoken to me. She probably feels I was critical but my niece was very understanding about it. I think after this wedding our 2 families may part ways. We are just too different. I have had these deep hurts for so long since my sister tried turning my 2 oldest daughters against me. And she has been mean to my son many times so he doesn't care for her but he does like my niece. Anyway, I'm not sure what you mean about scorched earth.

Here is my article about the solution to my dilemma. Thank you for your input. Everyone felt the same way you did. I am so used to being stepped on, I guess.

https://hklarajane.medium.com/how-i-ended-up-dealing-with-my-son-not-being-invited-to-my-nieces-wedding-6515c940c0a